So, I received a call last week from my good friend Paul over at Demetrios (http://demetriosbride.com/) telling me that my dress had come in. When I think back on the call, it plays through my mind like a happy Disney number, something out of Beauty & the Beast where the baker & the librarian & the village people (not those village people) dance hand-in-hand as birds chirp in delight.
Technically, it was just a call to schedule the first fitting. But Paul can make just about anything magical.
I arrived at the Demetrios fitting location wearing 12 gallons of water. We were having the equivalent of a Tsunami here in NYC & after walking ten blocks with some ineffective cloth and metal claiming to be an umbrella, I was in no shape to don the gown of my dreams. After drying off as best I could, I went in the fitting room with Emily, a lovely woman with a sharp pair of scissors and the confidence to snip & mark a dress in seconds.
Trying on the dress was (and I know how cliche this word is), surreal. It’s my dress! And it’s on me in a room with beautiful lighting! And we’re cutting it to fit me! Which is also scary because I still haven’t married (ha!) my shoe choice, an important factor in determining the length of my dress. I bought these online, but they were super tight so I’ve ordered them up a size & we’ll see how they fit. I love the antique quality & the “something blue” aspect.
Random aside: I can’t love bustling more. Good god, I love a giant bustled JLo booty. The more that thing sticks out, the better. Am I tiptoeing into fetish territory here? I don’t mean to, I just love those old fashioned pics of renaissance women with a huge bustled badonkadonk. I have to say: my dress, when bustled, is a booty-riffic sight to behold.
So, we’re rolling! The awesome peeps at Demetrios are hard at work making my dress fit perfectly. I made it clear to Emily that I have no interest in actually breathing in the gown, so she can take it in until I have completely impossible barbie-sized proportions. Which means I damn well better stop eating between now & my next fitting in early August. And let me tell you, I have every intention of doing just that. After this bowl of ice cream. And maybe one Cadbury bar. But then for real! Except for going out to dinner tonight. But after that?! Forget about it!
(also Sunday brunch. BUT AFTER THAT?! IT’S ONNNNN!)
In fact, it’s almost more important than writing this blog. But this blog is so easy. I get to sit in a comfortable chair and pour my heart out to thousands of strangers. I get to sip coffee in my pajamas & think about the horrendous dresses I’ve tried on to date, rather than stand naked in front of a woman tugging crinoline over my head.
So I’ll just write a blog about it.
I don’t have a dress. And it’s now 3 months until the wedding. And while I knew this was a pressing priority, crisis mode didn’t smack me in the face until I saw an article in The Knot recommending you order your dress at the 9 month out mark.
I have run the gamut in my dress explorations. I’ve met with private designers. I’ve been to bridal salons. I’ve 90% committed…only to second guess myself within minutes & walk out of the store flustered.
Here’s the conundrum in which I live: I want a big dress. But I don’t want a big dress. Let me clarify- I don’t want to look like a Disney princess slash cake topper:
But I have the opportunity to wear beautiful dresses quite often & I want my wedding dress to be special- something I couldn’t get away with wearing on a red carpet. I want some volume, but I want a little less traditional. A little edgy, but appropriate to the venue. A needle in a haystack.
And time is so not on my side. At this point, I’m going to be expediting the order or sneaking out with a floor sample under my sweater.
I’ve got an appointment at Demetrios (http://www.demetriosbride.com/) this week. I need you to send me “FIND THE DRESS” vibes. I have a good gut feeling- they came highly recommended & from the little poking around I’ve done on the website, I actually have hope.
To be continued…hopefully in a celebratory “I FOUND A DRESS” blog.
Ok, I suck. It’s been way too long between blog posts. And while I’d like to blame it on things like impromptu trips to Florida, AC, Philly & Wisconsin (and I sort of do), I take full responsibility (except see above).
First off, before I even get into wedding-y stuff, the response to my last blog post was…amazing. I got emails and facebook messages and tweets from so many of you who were touched by our sentiment. I wish I had the words to tell you how much it hit my heart to know that what we wrote was so well received. It’s always a little scary to take a stand that you know full well will (and did) alienate some people. I can tell you that in hindsight after the TENS OF THOUSANDS of webhits my last post received, not only did I feel heartfelt appreciation from so many of our gay friends, but I also received a couple messages from people who stopped to rethink their position and have started to feel differently about the issue. That’s beyond words amazing. It takes a lot to admit you may have been wrong about something (ask Richie- I think he’s heard those words come out of my mouth maybe once? And if pressed I might still deny it), so I wholeheartedly congratulate those of you who paused to reflect. I know, I know- a little blog that made a couple people think is a drop of water on a blaze, but it’s also indicative of the fact that change begets change and one voice can inspire thousands. So, you know, say something.
Speaking of saying, I need to say one more thing about the subject before I return you to your regularly scheduled blog, as promised by the now slightly misleading blog title.
My dad LOVES the picture Richie & I took with NOH8. Loves it. To an embarrassing extent. Like, he’s had it printed in 8x10s, had it blown up to poster size, mounted it on foam core board, and had some sort of canvas portrait created as well. I literally can’t get away from myself, which is completely creepy. I’m waiting for my next birthday present to come wrapped in custom marriage announcement wrapping paper as I sit home in my NOH8 pic checkered pajama pants, cuddling with my custom printed throw blanket, sipping coffee from a mug with my face looking sternly back at me. Essentially, our duct tapped faces are everywhere & it’s gotten slightly out of hand.
So, it came as no surprise that my dad sent our picture to a popular website to have custom postage stamps printed so our smiling faces could haunt the upper right hand corner of every letter he mails out (also, who even sends letters anymore? But I digress).
Imagine his surprise when his order was rejected & he received this email:
Unfortunately, we are currently unable to accept the image you have submitted as part of your order.
For this reason, your entire order has been canceled and your credit card will not be charged. We were unable to accept your image for the following reason:
This image was not accepted because it did not meet our content guidelines. Click here for more info on our content
Please note that owing to privacy concerns, our customer support representatives do not have access to any submitted images and they cannot provide additional details on why your submission did not meet our content guidelines.
We thank you for ordering from us and we apologize for any inconvenience this may have caused you. We encourage you to try again.
So naturally, I looked up content restrictions and found this:
Content Restrictions: You agree not to upload, order for print, or otherwise transmit or communicate any material for any unlawful purpose or that is obscene, offensive, blasphemous, pornographic, sexually suggestive, deceptive, threatening, menacing, abusive, harmful, an invasion of privacy, supportive of unlawful action, defamatory, libelous, vulgar, violent, or otherwise objectionable.
Ok, seriously. Blasphemous? Pornographic? Deceptive? Obscene? Do I need to post the picture again?
What about our pro-marriage equality statement did they find so thoroughly offensive?
There are many companies who print custom photo stamps. I thought long and hard about whether or not to publicly blast these guys on here (umm, obviously I found the CEO’s home address and I’m not gonna lie- it might have been fun to start a friendly campaign of sorts- perhaps exploring stamp designs more…overtly…in violation of the aforementioned “content restrictions”), but ultimately I’ve thought better of it. When I look at what happened as a whole, it just serves as a reminder that as open as NY has proven to be post-equality vote, the rest of the country’s just not there yet. If more people speak up, hopefully we can get to a point where any loving relationship….can be pictured on a postage stamp?
Ok, so it’s now clear that my blog post title was a complete (but unintentional!) lie. Seriously though, how could I go back to dress shopping (OMG! I have so much to tell you!) and cake tastings (I’m trying the chocolate peanut butter invention next week!! Wheee! Free cake!!) when the custom postage stamp industry had some ‘splainin to do? 🙂
Love to all of you-
I’m back in town from my first weekend away from Richie since the engagement. Missed him! I spent time with my family; Richie had the “work” assignment of covering Ronnie Mund’s appearance at a strip club in Indy. Tough day at the office, eh?
While I was home, I finally had the face-to-face chance to sit down with my sisters annnnnnnnd ask them to be my bridesmaids! 🙂 I don’t want a big crazy wedding party- just my two sisters & one of my childhood best friends, Cyndi.
It’s got me thinking dresses & I thought I’d bring the debate to you guys because you’re awesome at this stuff. Generally I despise bridesmaid dresses (no offense, Cyn- I loved* the dress I wore as your Maid of Honor and am going to wear** it all the time).
Here are the priorities:
-I want the three of them to look and feel beautiful & elegant.
-I want the dress to be appropriate for different ages, my sisters are (mumblecough) years older than me (I was a flower girl in one sister’s wedding & a 10 yr old bridesmaid in the others) and I don’t want them to feel like their wearing something out of the juniors section that they’re uncomfortable in.
-I want colors that complement some of the design elements. One thing we’re dealing with is a unique shade of blue in the wall behind us and some centerpieces we’re looking at that are made of old amber/brown glass. So maybe in the neutral/blush colors?
-I don’t want them to spend a boatload of money.
What do you guys think about using three related colors for dresses rather than them matching? Like different shades of the same basic color. What about doing that AND using three different style dresses so each person looks their best? But then how do you tie them together? Use the same material maybe? And how do you coordinate it with the groomsmen? I feel like the whole matching cummerbund thing is very prom-esque.
I’m prepared for your genius thoughts on all things bridesmaid dressy. Go.
Use these for some quick inspiration:
*read: theoretically appreciated
**read: remember it fondly